Chronicles of Connor J.: Educationing in Parenting Day 1 & 2

So shortly after Connor was born, my sister came in and was his first official visitor. It was great being able to share that moment with her and I can see the absolute joy on her face as she now officially an aunt. She was awesome enough to buy us snacks and Subway, which absolutely hit the spot given that we hadn't eaten since around noonish and with the adrenaline wearing off, I was getting a little dizzy.

Once she took off, we got settled into our hospital room and then the "fun" began. Barbara got her first taste of attempting to breast feed and it wasn't pleasant. I think there are any words to describe it other then painful and uncomfortable and on top of that the epidural was starting to wear off so she was starting to feel the damage that occurred during the pregnancy. Even worse, her feet became so bloated that you could leave thumb prints in there and it became painful for her to walk. And when you think it can't get any worse, she also developed awful hemorrhoids which impacted her ability to sit and made it super painful when she went to the bathroom. So while she's dealing with all of that, I'm working on changing a diaper & trying to get the little man to sleep. The diaper was horrifying because even though I was warned that the poop would be gnarly at first, you never really realize how bad it is until you have to clean it. It was like cleaning up a bunch of tootsie rolls that melted in the diaper. And then attempting to swaddle the kid + get him to sleep was a total mystery to me. I didn't really know the right way to hold him and how to get the swaddle so tight that he wouldn't break through. Luckily the nurses were around to help out, but I came to the quick realization that I had NO CLUE what I was doing. The nurses ended up taking Connor away for a little bit just so Barbara and I could catch up on some sleep.

When we woke the next morning, Barbara was REALLY feeling the pain and it wasn't pleasant. She held up well especially since we had our first visitors around ~10AM - my dad and step mom and Barbara's mom/dad/brother. From there on out, it was a constant rotation of visitors coming in and out, taking pictures, bringing us food/coffee, and just holding our little guy. All the family / friends that showed up, texted, facebook'd, etc. really made us feel loved and supported. It also got Barbara's mind off the extreme pain she was going through. Unfortunately once everyone left, it was back to the pain and it was tough to watch. She'd be in tears as she struggled through the breast feeding and just generally sitting in bed. The bathroom was her enemy as she went through a major routine of cleaning and doing other unmentionable things just to go pee.

On the 2nd day, we essentially took EVERYTHING we could from the hospital that would help ease Barbara's pain. I also had to deal with watching what I thought was the most painful event I have ever seen....Connor's circumcision. The tools they put around his penis are things that you see in horror movies. Luckily the kid was a champ - he barely cried, though he did leave a poop present for the doctor. We also had a lactation consultant come in and try to give Barbara some tips on breast feeding. They're super nice people, but they're a little snobby when it comes to feeding. Essentially their job is to tell that breast feeding can be easy and at no given point in time should formula been given to your child. I'll write more on this later as there are more horror stories to come.

Around 11AM, we packed up, got Connor into his car seat (which he HATED off the bat) and got into the old RDX and went home. It was an exciting / scary day, but it was only the beginning of our little adventure....